Stop Trying To Make Interracial Dating a Thing. It's Not a Thing.

Image from Betty Anderson

This is something more digestible, straightforward, and close to heart (as usual). So here it goes.

One of the questions I hate hearing, and being asked about, is

How is it like being in an interracial relationship?

It seems to me that by inserting that phrase - "interracial relationship" - one tends to single out the relationship as a 'type' of relationship that is unusual. An other. 

Interracial dating, or romantic interracial relationships in general, has become a trend and a cause to fight for. 

"Oh!! He's into Indian girls! Interracial couples are so cute."

"You date Chinese guys, so inclusive. More people should do interracial dating."

I get the whole point people are trying to make:

• The occurrence of interracial relationships means that there are people in this world who can look past race, and that's what we all need right now. Especially in Malaysia. 
• That means more mixed babies, ie. people with 'exotic' facial features.
• That one day race will be an obsolete topic, and politicians cannot play the race card, because everyone is mixed race. 

In short, some people are happy to see interracial relationships popping up like mushrooms after a rain because this means that society will one day move past the need to discuss about race. As mentioned earlier, this is a matter close to many people's hearts, especially in multi-racial nations. 

However, by talking about it in such a manner only serves to magnify the topic of race. 

Because you're making a big deal out of the fact that 2 people of different race can fall in love and form a romantic bond with each other. When, in fact, the thing the same group of people want to prove, is that race is not a hindrance to anything.

But since people are so interested to know the answer to that bolded and italicised question, here's my answer:

I am aware that I'm Chinese. I am aware that he's not. 

But I never once viewed it as an interracial relationship. It never occurred to me that "hey, I'm a Chinese and I'm dating a non-Chinese". All I knew was that I really liked this guy, who felt the same way for me, and hence we're dating. 

The same goes to when I see interracial couples. I never see it as a Chinese-guy-dating-Indian-girl thing; all I see are two individuals who are very much in love with each other. 

Of course there are cases where interracial couples face social ostracism, even from their own family members. They don't deserve to be treated thus, and it's a sad thing that this is still happening in many places. All the more reason we should normalise it, and not single it out as a 'thing'. 

Because it is not. 

It's just two normal individuals coming together to form a beautiful bond.

Just think of it this way: quacking about "interracial relationship" is like saying "fetch", it's never gonna happen. So stop trying to make it happen.